


It Is a Very Big Decision

by Irollforinitiative



Category: Sherlock (TV)
Genre: Established Relationship, M/M, Marriage, Parenthood, Parentlock, Pregnancy
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2013-06-18
Updated: 2013-06-28
Packaged: 2017-12-15 08:19:17
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 4,080
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/847343
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Irollforinitiative/pseuds/Irollforinitiative
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It is a very big decision to have a baby and not one that Sherlock takes lightly. And yet, it's a decision he's made and one that John agrees to. Follows the journey from awkward conversations to weddings to hospital rooms.  Not mpreg. Established relationship. If you want you can say it's a follow up to my fic The Experiment.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> They have "the talk". Not sure if I'm going to increase the rating later. It just depends on if you guys want to have some sex or just keep it pg so let me know in comments.

It was, surprisingly, Sherlock who first brought up the idea of having a child. Over six months after John and Sherlock had unwittingly found themselves in some form of a romantic relationship and twenty months after Sherlock returned to Baker St. after faking his death, he sat down at the kitchen table, still naked from the night before and heaved a sigh. John looked up from his tea and morning paper, already showered and in a dressing gown, and raised his eyebrows. The sigh was indicative that Sherlock had been thinking about something he'd deemed important but wasn't sure of the social etiquette surrounding discussing it. Ever since the fight they'd had over Sherlock announcing one day that he never planned on actually formalizing their relationship, he'd become wary of bringing up topics at bad times. This, however, was not a bad time. John was a little sore from the night before and already had his tea.

 

"Out with it Sherlock." John sipped his tea and set the paper aside. 

 

Sherlock glanced up and crossed his long legs under the table. "Are you sure? I do not wish to fight when you've got work today. If we spend the time after you return home from the surgery fighting it won't leave any time for sex and I want to do it the other way 'round tonight."

 

John couldn't help smile a little. Once sparked, Sherlock's sexual appetite had become bottomless. "I can't promise we won't fight but now is as good a time as any to bring up something that might tick me off."

 

"Mmm," he hummed, "less about ticking you off and more about scaring you."

 

"Oh well now I have to know." John chuckled and set even his tea aside.

 

"I think we should have a child." Sherlock didn't make eye contact but his voice was steady, confident in his statement.

 

John became very thankful he'd set the tea aside as he would have surely spilled it everywhere with the sudden jerk his entire body made. "What?!"

 

Sherlock sighed. "I knew it wasn't a good time."

 

"No…no it's fine." John calmed himself down, not missing the way Sherlock's eyes had tightened. He didn't like John's reaction. "I just…it's a surprise. You hate people."

 

"Exactly. I hate people. Adults. Children are entirely different.  They are shapeable, teachable. A child is usually scores more clever than an adult and, if raised properly, can become a brilliant and worthwhile adult. Ergo, I think we need to raise at least one such child."

 

"So you want to adopt"

 

Sherlock shook his head. "That leaves too much to genetic chance. I want us to be the parents."

 

John frowned and his brows creased. He tired to not sound condescending." Sherlock, I'm not sure if you've deleted this little fact or not, but two men can't have a baby together. It's physically impossible."

 

"Oh God don't be dull," Sherlock rolled his eyes, "you have a sister, don't you. A sister who as at minimum a quarter of the exact same genetic makeup as you have. Although studies indicate that with siblings that look so much alike as the two of you do, it is probably closer to three quarters. That is close enough to a genetic match for me."

 

John stared at him, mouth half opened. "So wait…you want to have a baby with my sister?" he knew that wasn't what Sherlock was getting at but the entire situation was surreal and John was struggling to understand the basic logic.

 

Sherlock looked at John and sighed heavily, realizing how much shock John's system was in. He reached out and took John's hand, doing his best to speak kindly. "No, John. I want to have a child. With you. Because I love you and there is an instinctual desire to procreate in humans. Moreover, I'm entirely certain you and I could produce and raise an exemplary child. Seeing as how the past almost seven months have proven that traditional means will obviously and logically not work, we must turn to other options. While I do not trust Harry to carry our child to term, I do trust her genetic material. If she donates an egg, and I am the father, then we only need a surrogate for nine months and we will have a child that is very nearly our own genetic child. A little bit of paperwork and, I suppose for the ease, the official union of the two of us, and we have a proper family. Thus fulfilling instinct as well as logic."

 

Of all of the things Sherlock had just said, for some reason John fixated on the smallest of the current worries. "Who would be the surrogate?"

 

"Molly. I'm entirely sure she will consent and I can use part of the family money I'm entitled to as a way to pay for her services." He smiled, proud of himself for having thought it through so well.

 

"So…you would be the father and I would be the child's uncle?" John squinted, trying to understand.

 

Sherlock chewed his lip. "Genetically, yes. But that is a better option than an unknown variable as the egg donator and a mixture of our semen for paternity. We have such different physical markers we would always know who the genetic father of the child was. This way the child would essentially be ours."

 

"And…did you propose in the middle of that explanation as well?" John was trying to replay Sherlock's words in his head.

 

Sherlock blushed a little. "Essentially. I do not see the need for it: I trust you to not leave me and I'll never leave you, ever. However, it makes becoming parents easier.  So…yes."

 

John took a deep breath, still pale, and Sherlock started to get anxious, not that it showed in anything other than the color of his face. John was too wrapped up in his own anxieties to notice.

 

"You may take a few days to think before you answer about any and all of this. It is rather a lot to process."

 

John nodded. "Thanks, yeah. If the proposal is freestanding from the having a child bit I can at least answer that."

 

Sherlock's mouth tugged into a small grin. "It is. I saw your internet history. You want a wedding."

 

"I do. I really do. I always have." John's cheeks colored slightly and he smiled at Sherlock.

 

Sherlock merely got up and primly went to get on one knee next to John, entirely too poised for a man naked and ruffled from sleep. "Then, John Watson, will you marry me?"

 

John's face split into a wide grin and he nodded. "Yeah. I will."

 

Sherlock smiled and leaned up to kiss John, taking his time with the kiss.  When they pulled away both men were flushed and grinning.

 

"Not the most romantic proposal, but somehow perfectly you." John held Sherlock's face and kissed him softly again. "But, much as I'd like to stay here and let you shag me senseless in celebration of our sudden engagement, I have work."

 

Sherlock chuckled and went back to his chair at the table. "We always have tonight. But I already said I want to do it the other way 'round tonight." he picked up John's discarded tea and sipped it.

 

John was dressed and back in the kitchen within minutes, kissing Sherlock's hair. "Okay. I'll shag you senseless tonight in celebration. And I'll give what you said some though. I love you." he kissed Sherlock's temple, the genius already gone from the world as an article in the paper caught his eye, and rushed out the door.

 

During the cab ride the events of the morning seemed to come crashing down on John and he broke into a fit of hysterical giggles. Somehow he and Sherlock had gotten engaged over breakfast. And were considering having kids. John shook his head and giggled harder, feeling manic. Life with Sherlock had never been sane or logical. It seemed that wasn't going to change anytime soon. Marrying Sherlock wouldn't change anything. They'd gone from best mates to desperately close best mates when Sherlock came back after the horrible Bart's incident. Then Sherlock's curious and antsy nature got the better of him and the two of them ended up together. It was complicated and difficult at first. Kissing Sherlock had been like a dream come true. The sex was…difficult and awkward at first but once they'd gotten comfortable with one another it was mind blowing. Sherlock could see the tiniest shifts in John and know exactly what felt best. When Sherlock was apologizing or feeling particularly giving he had the ability to render John speechless for almost an hour after sex. It was brilliant. Marriage wouldn't change that. It wouldn't change anything. Knowing Sherlock it would be a little ordeal in a courthouse with just the closes of family and would probably happen sooner as opposed to later. That wasn't what worried John.  It was the idea of children.

 

John loved children. He really did. But John had never actually planned on planning for children. It was a luxury of the straight. He'd planned on falling in love, getting married, and getting a bit careless with the prophylactics. It was easier than worrying and fretting. You either have a baby or you don't. Usually you do. But the part where he fell in love with a man complicated things.  They couldn't just accidentally have children.  It took planning and thought. Two things Sherlock had already put into the situation. He'd done everything but make the bloody doctor's appointments. Sherlock was serious. He'd put real thought and effort into this and even worked to bring it up to John at a good time. Sherlock wanted John to say yes. The question became whether John even wanted to say yes.

 

Sherlock started worrying the moment John left the flat. Perhaps it had been the wrong time. Perhaps it wasn't even proper to ask it. The urge to panic rose in Sherlock's chest and so he decided to try and make it up to John. In the past months of their relationship Sherlock had quickly learned how to properly apologize to John.  During their time as friends, Sherlock's version of apologizing would be to purchase one of the fifty things they needed from the store and present it to John. It was out of his usual behavioral norms and did well to make John smile and forgive him. However, he quickly found that when in a sexual and romantic relationship, buying the milk didn't cut it. After insulting John a few weeks into the relationship, he'd had the milk thrown into the sink as John loudly proclaimed it to be not enough. Then to apologize for not apologizing properly he'd decided to try what the cook had always done for the housekeeper when they fought.  He cleaned the flat, cooked a large and expensive dinner, and had the kitchen candlelit when John returned home from work. It had been highly successful and allowed Sherlock to use his experimental energy for cooking, which pleased John.

 

Therefore, upon realizing he had potentially screwed up royally, Sherlock began to clean. It took him until the middle of the day to scrape up the grime from his failed cooking experiments in the kitchen and until almost two to get the shopping for dinner completed. But once he returned home with the ingredients, he went into action. By the time half five rolled around Sherlock had set romantic lighting, cleaned, and cooked the salmon and fresh basil pasta that John had loved so much. Sherlock tensed when he heard John coming up the stairs to the flat.

 

John smelled the cooking as soon as he entered the main door to the building and guilt washed over him. Sherlock thought he was angry. He sighed and climbed the stairs loudly, wanting Sherlock to have warning so everything could be set out perfectly. Sherlock's apology dinners were a thing of beauty and John loved admiring them. As soon as he opened the door to the flat he groaned as the smell hit him.

 

"Sherlock that smells bloody amazing." he dropped his bag and coat.

 

Sherlock smiled and wiped his hands. "Good. I'm glad you think so. I…I wanted to apologize. For this morning."

 

John frowned. It hurt to see Sherlock unsure of himself and it was a rare sight. Only when Sherlock was sure he'd driven John off was he unsure. John shook his head and walked over to Sherlock. "Hey. You've nothing to apologize about."

 

"But I sprung that on you and it scared you. I could see that it scared you. And I want you happy. So I'm sorry." he wrapped his arms around John.

 

John shook his head. "It startled me. Didn't scare. In fact I thought about it and I've got an answer for you."

 

Sherlock's eyes went hard as he prepared himself for the worst. "I understand John."

 

"No you don't. Because I think it's a brilliant idea." John smiled.

 

Sherlock stared at him with wide eyes. "You…what?"

 

He laughed and felt his eyes grow wet. "I want to have a baby with you, Sherlock."

 

 


	2. Wedding Bells

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Wedding bells ring and John tries not to get too scared.

Sherlock stepped forward and kissed John firmly before planting sloppy kisses all over his face. "We're going to have a baby." he giggled.

 

John smiled. He hadn't seen Sherlock this happy in a while. Content was something Sherlock was still getting used to being. Exuberant was a rare occurrence.

 

John nodded and held Sherlock close, "Yes we are."

 

Sherlock stepped back and took John's hand. "Come on."

 

"Come on where you made us dinner." John didn't follow Sherlock's tug on his hand.

 

Sherlock rolled his eyes. "It can wait. Let's go to the place with the marriage licenses and get married."

 

John's eyebrows rose sharply. "Now? You want to do that now?"

 

"Yes. I don't want to wait. I'm tired of waiting." Sherlock tugged his hand again.

 

"But what about our friends and family. Sherlock we can wait." John let Sherlock's hand go and crossed his arms.

 

Sherlock stared at him for a moment before turning around and stalking into the sitting room, throwing himself down on the sofa in a sulk, his back to the room.

 

John sighed and rubbed his hand across his forehead, following. "I'm sorry. I do want to marry you. Don't get me wrong. But you made this nice dinner and it's late. The magistrate is probably closed."

 

"They're not." Sherlock's voice was muffled by the back of the sofa.

 

"And how do you know that?" John sat on the coffee table and watched Sherlock.

 

Sherlock sighed. "Because they're staying open late for us."

 

John stared for a moment. "Oh? They are?"

 

Sherlock nodded, the movement only visible by the bouncing of his curls. "This morning you said you'd marry me. So after dinner I thought we could do that. But then you said yes to children so I wanted to go immediately."

 

"But why does it have to be so immediate? Can't we wait and plan it?"

 

Sherlock just curled up tighter on himself.

 

John sighed and ran a hand roughly through his short hair. "Come on, love. Talk to me. Tell me why you want to do this right now as opposed to in a few months?"

 

Sherlock relaxed a little at the affectionate term, turning his face just enough so he could speak easily. "Because I don't get good things in life. Especially when I wait. I wanted a pony. Mummy said wait for Christmas. I got a suit. I told Mycroft I didn't want him to leave me alone when he went to Uni. He said wait and I'd get to leave and go to Uni soon too. Those were the worst years of my life and Uni was even worse. I finally found a friend and someone I cared for and I waited to say anything for fear of scaring you off and then I nearly lost you to bloody Moriarty's backup plans. I'm tired of waiting. This is something good. Finally. I want it now and not in a few months when you've had the time to change your mind or decide this isn't wise." he pushed his face back into the cushions of the sofa.

 

John nodded and stood, picking his coat up off the back of his chair. "Okay. Let's go."

 

Sherlock sat up and looked at John, a frown firmly rooted on his face. "What?"

 

"Let's go. It means something to you to go this instant and get legally married so let's go." He held Sherlock's coat out to him.

 

Sherlock smiled softly and stood, taking the coat. "You would do that for me?"

 

John rolled his eyes, realizing living with Sherlock was starting to rub off on him. "Yes, you daft twat. Now come on. Like you said, we can eat when we get back."

 

It was a surprisingly easy process.  A short cab ride, showing some identification, signing a few pieces of paper, and buying some simple silver bands from the sets they have specially for spur of the moment weddings. John suspected that it was usually quite a bit harder and more complicated but the Holmes last name had opened doors as it usually did. With the necessary paperwork for a name change should they decide to do that, Sherlock and John were in the cab returning to Baker St. less than an hour later.

 

John looked down at his left hand. "Holy shit…we're married."

 

Sherlock looked over at him and raised an eyebrow. "Yes, I know. After all that is what we just did."

 

"No I just mean…I married you. I've spent so long thinking I'd never get married and then I met you and then we got together and just…I've wanted to marry you since then. I thought you'd never want it but you did. We're married. I married the love of my life."

 

"John you know I am not one for gross sentimental displays. However…" he leaned over and kissed John, slipping his tongue into the shorter man's mouth and moaning softly as the kiss continued for a long while. When the finally broke apart Sherlock was grinning, "however, I share your happiness at the opportunity to marry the love of my life."

 

John grinned and kissed Sherlock again. "When we get home I expect you to eat a big dinner. I'm going to work rather a lot of it off of you tonight."

 

"Oh good because I expect to do the same to you." Sherlock grinned mischievously.

 

John showed up two hours late to work due to a very long shower after Sherlock decided to join him and having only gotten two hours of sleep the night before. And yet, he was grinning widely all day. Once he explained his tardiness by saying he'd gotten married the night before, all reprimanding ended and was replaced with congratulations and hugs from nurses. The day only started feeling long when John realized it was the day after he'd gotten married and instead of being on his honeymoon or even just home with Sherlock, he was wiping phlegm off his lab coat where a little boy had sneezed on him.  When five o'clock rolled around John was exceedingly happy to pack up and head home. However, his path to the tube station was blocked by a sleek black car. The door opened as he approached and he sighed and slipped in.

 

Mycroft was smiling softly and the car started once John was inside.

 

"What do you want, Mycroft." John quipped.

 

Mycroft raised an eyebrow. "Is that any way to treat your new brother in law?"

 

John blushed softly. "So you know?"

 

"Of course I know. I'm the one that made sure the office would stay open for the two of you. I offer my congratulations."

 

"No warning that you'll deport me if I hurt him?" John chuckled. "How demure of you."

 

Mycroft smiled a little. "No. Considering that you tend to kill the people that hurt him, I've nothing to fear. I only have one warning. Holmes children have the potential for being the worst children you have ever met."

 

John rubbed a hand over the back of his neck. Of course Mycroft would know about that too. "I assumed as much. But I love him. I want this."

 

Mycroft smiled genuinely, something John had never seen before. "Thank you. I've never known anyone aside from myself to actually properly love Sherlock until you came into his life. So, thank you."

 

John nodded as the car stopped at Baker St. "Come round for tea soon. Okay?"

 

"Perhaps." The door shut and the car was off.

 

John shook his head and climbed the stairs to the flat. Sherlock was asleep on the sofa and next to him were the name change papers. He'd written in a last name change to "Watson-Holmes" for both of them and signed his. John signed his paperwork and went about re-heating leftovers from the night before for supper. On the kitchen table sat Sherlock's laptop. While the oven went to work on the food John sat down to check his email. A chat window opened. John smiled when he recognized the name and responded.

 

 

MHoops: Sherlock?

 

SH: No it's John.

 

MHoops: OH HI JOHN!!

 

SH: Hello Molly. All right?

 

MHoops: Better than. I stopped by the obstetrics floor today for a quick bit of blood work to make sure I'll be okay to surrogate for you two. I was given the heads up and I picked up my hormone blockers today.

 

SH:…wow so we're really going at this at a clip.

 

MHoops: Not really. Sherlock talked to me about this six months ago.

 

MHoops: Shit I wasn't supposed to tell you that.

 

MHoops: Don't be mad. He wanted to wait until you were ready to ask you.

 

SH: I'm not mad just….overwhelmed. I suppose that means he's talked to my sister about being the egg donor too.

 

MHoops: Actually they already collected and froze eggs from her.

 

SH: Holy fuck.

 

MHoops: Sorry.

 

SH: It's not your fault.

 

SH: I need to go wake Sherlock up and talk to him.

 

John shut the laptop and the sound roused Sherlock.

 

"Mmmm…hello husband." Sherlock smiled sleepily.

 

"Hello." John's voice was tight.

 

Sherlock immediately sat up and frowned, sleep gone from his face almost instantly. "What is it, what's wrong? Was that Molly? Is something wrong?"

 

"No. She got the all clear. I just…it's all really…really fast, Sherlock." John moved to sit in his chair.

 

Sherlock nodded. "I am aware but most likely it won't happen on the first try and even if it does we have nine more months."

 

John groaned. "And we just talked about it yesterday!" he put his head in his hands.

 

"You're scared."

 

"Of course I'm bloody scared!"

 

Sherlock frowned and nodded. "Pretend we are an average couple. Pretend we forgot a prophylactic and now we're going to have a child."

 

John lifted his head and sighed. "But we're not an average couple. None of this is normal. Why can't we just go slow like other people?"

 

"Because the same reasons I bloody gave last night! Because I'm tired of waiting! Aren't you!?" he stood and paced, "The world tells you to wait when you want something because you want to be _really, really_ sure that you do. You have to wait and plan and prepare and fret until you can't breathe for the preparation and it doesn't help at all! People are forced into snap decisions every day and are happy. Aren't you happy we got married last night?" he looked at John, eyes imploring.

 

John smiled softly. "Yeah. I'm really happy we did."

 

"Then trust me." He sat on the arm of John's chair.

 

John looked up at him and nodded. "Okay. Okay I trust you. But I'm going to be bloody terrified the entire time because I'm not even sure I'll make a good father."

 

Sherlock leaned down and kissed John softly. "You'll do perfect." he stood and pulled the food from the oven, "I already called you in from work next Wednsday. We're going to the clinic for sperm collection and they're going to have the first attempt at implantation in Molly."

 

John swallowed and took a calming breath. "Okay. Okay that sounds…okay." 


End file.
